A Digital Perspective

..the fact that such a gross error was allowed to occur and offend a loyal customer, and then firing the cowering underling responsible…

Part 2 of 4 from: iPhone, Vodafone and my $800 bill

I’ve been a Vodafone customer for about 2 years on a $79 cap.  I’m used to the amount of text and calls that allows me, and even the 1×5 minute blocks of internet time I can use. I got burnt once through my own fault some years ago - never again.

I’m a self confessed gadget freak; a technology evangelist, if you will.  I have full blown nerdgasms at times and  I’ve been working in the digital media industry for 2 years. I’m the last person who should get this wrong.

The Bill

Opening the bill was gobsmacking. I’ve rarely felt this angry before.  At first I was plagued with self doubt, but after showing it to colleagues we all agreed that no, there’s no way in hell 25MB of data could cost an indvidual $400+ in a single sitting. Something had to be wrong.  It seemed apparent that something had not switched over in my account.

NB: My advice on what Vodafone could do better is coming in post 4.

The Call

Here’s where it gets interesting.

It’s Monday morning and I need to call Vodafone.  I’ve left my bill in my other bag. Shitballs. Not to worry, I can look it up online.  Oh wait - no, I can’t, because their site doesn’t work and I’m getting Error 400’s continuously. Stupendous.

I make it through the awful voice prompts.

Yay, ringing!!

No, wait, it rang out. Apparently everyone’s too busy to help me.

The clock is quickly approaching 5 minutes before I’ve even come into verbal contact with a human. And there it goes… 5 minutes and waiting, and the voice loop has gone back to the start, and then the music loop. Sigh.

6 mins:
I can feel the ragemahol building inside me.

7mins:
The music loop is broken. I keep hearing the outro to ‘I like you’ or some bullshit over again. This is fucking torture.

7mins, 15secs:
Finally get to talk to a real person. Let’s call her ‘Heather’. Heather doesn’t seem to have too much information for me. I state my disbelief at the size of my bill, and also point out that my bill for this new billing period is showing that I’ve somehow used over $700 worth of my $99 Mighty Cap in 2 weeks.

9mins:
Back on hold. Awful song kicks back in. At least I get to listen to a whole song this time, and not just the outro. Voice loops back on. My ears start to bleed.

12mins:
Still on hold. As angry as I am right now, I’m grateful they’re not immediately saying, ‘I’m sorry, sir, but you’re fucked. Now pay up.’ Hopefully some big manager is looking at my bill with disbelief and sympathy, shaking his head at the fact that such a gross error was allowed to occur and offend a loyal customer, and then firing the cowering underling responsible.

14minutes is here: I’m making this call from work, so perhaps this will get me fired too? Yay!!

15minutes: my friend Heather is back.

Apparently this is going a take a while, so if I want to call back in 10 minutes, we can do that.

“Yes please,” I say, “That’s fine.”

“Is there anything else I can help you with?”

“I don’t think so. Just the enormous fucking bill.”

Heather then advises me that my data was being charged at the full rate and they didn’t recognise that I had a 500MB allowance.

“That’s an incredibly high rate,” I point out.

“Yes. Well. We’re not charging you for any of your data over the last month on this bill and your new balance is just over $200.”

I enquire if the total is ever going to be calculated on the bill.

“Not yet,” Heather tells me.

“Can I be alerted when I go over my cap or am nearing the end?”

“No,” Heather says, “But if you go onto the site you can check yourself.”

“Will this ever happen?”

“Ahh not sure. Maybe one day. We should do that. Would you like me to put in a feedback form for you?”

I tell her I’ll write it myself.

• iPhone, Vodafone and my $800 bill: Part 1
• Part 2: The Call to Vodafone
• Part 3: Return of Stupidity: iPhone, Vodafone - FFS
• Part 4: What Vodafone could do to improve iPhone